"...I know all our days are struggle and warfare
and that the spirit-to-spirit combat I endlessly wage with Satan
is this ferocious thrash for joy.
He sneers at all the things that seem to have gone hideously mad
in this sin-drunk world,
and I gasp to say God is good.
The liar defiantly scrawls his graffiti across God's glory,
and I heave to enjoy God...
and Satan strangles,
and I whiten knuckles to grasp real Truth
and fix that beast to the floor." (pg 90)
This chapter brought me to tears. Her mother's heart is so precious. Her struggle to understand pain and suffering in light of a loving, good God is recognizable. Learning to see life through God's lens, not my human, worldly view, but through the vision of heaven and the lens of a deity, my God. I am still learning to see beyond the pain and hurt and suffering to the potential grace and beauty.
warm rays of sun after a chilly morning
shared tomatoes from a neighbors bounty
unexpected memories of fun with my oldest son
What glasses or lens are you looking through? Do you have more than one?How do you process the bad of this world? Where does a "good God" fit in your mind?
How is your list of gifts coming along this week?
"...where God wounds Himself through with nails on a cross
and we wear the symbol as beauty." (pg 99)
* Image from The Hunting of the Snark blog.
Yes, this is a hard chapter. The question of how can a loving all powerful God allow bad to happen has sold more books than probably any other topic. I love how she portrays the things that come out of the darkness. If the seed were never in the dark soil, there would be no beauty of flowers. But most of all, if Christ never lied in the darkness of the tomb, there would be no "Light of the world"!!! The next time I am in darkness, will I remember that? Or will I whine that God didn't give me all I wanted rather than be thankful for getting "two"? There is no way I can answer that honestly as I sit here with my life in order and my needs (not wants) met. Will I praise Him in the storm? A huge part of me never wants to find out. But as Anne pointed out, I WILL lose everything and everyone eventually. That is the only way to get to Him, which is my goal and His goal in this short life. So I will just praise Him today that I HAVE been given "two", and both days full of needs met. More than I deserve, but the best is yet to come one day when He calls me to His mansion!
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